"...and if the 'never-never's' worth the doing, it's worth doing it right."
AMAZING!! [insert a belly laugh]
Oooooh…the things you find on message boards!
I seriously doubt anyone will even half-way “get” this besides Steven (…and if you don’t, it’s fine. :P), but this is absolutely brilliant. I plan to read it daily.
So (…Don’t Say) Temptation was proved false. Oh thank Kimberley. That was by far the most atrocious title for a song I’ve heard since Jesus was put on the cross. “Temptation” would have been fine. “Don’t Say” wouldn’t have been, as it would have obviously have been a ballad in the style of Westlife, complete with epic stool standing (of the excretment variety, rather than the chair like substance). And to be honest, both together would have been awful as I’ve had enough of the brackets and the elipses and “Sexy! (No No No…) was enough for any band.
So I vote that we emulate the Sugababes by nicking half of their name, like they’ve done.
“Babes” will take a sample of the McDonalds advert that sounds like Herbert from Family Guy and will be an updated version of Grange Hills anti-drugs slogan ‘Just Say No’ as well as taking a pop at some of their ‘non-specific’ rivals.
OH MY Kimberley! What a complete coincidence!
You wouldn’t believe this! Miranda Cooper has just sent me some lyrics through the post. Thanks again MiMi! Well, here they are. I’m sure she won’t mind me sharing…
“Babes”
Girls Aloud ft. Herbert
Herbert
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
(Nadine in style of her rap from Long Hot Summer)
Hey Kids! About on the street
All of you rocking to that hip hop beat
Be sly! And straighten that tie!
Don’t take drugs, it will turn you bi!
Sarah whilst pilled up
I was on crack for a year or two
So don’t ever believe it wont happen to you
But buy the Sugababes single in two weeks time
And I’ll go into the toilet for another cheeky line
Herbert
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
Nadine, still rapping
Non-Specific band, you’d better run away
Cause my dear old dad is in the IRA
We’ve seen Keisha in the bogs with Charlie
And Amelle went topless
Nicola
But her tits were gnarly
Kimberley
And yes Miss Range don’t think we don’t know
About your wideset vagina and your heavy flow
Aint no other man that will give you a look
When you got a nose like Daniella Westbrook
Nadine, Sarah and Kimberley, breathing as if having an orgasm
Drugs, don’t do drugs,
Sugar
Drugs, don’t do drugs
Babes
Drugs, don’t do drugs
Sugababes
Drugs, don’t do drugs
Just like a non-specific band
Herbert
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
Nicola
I’ve seen life burn bright, seen it shimmer
Then fade like starlight to a glimmer oh oh
I’ve seen life flow by, like a river
Sarah
And Heidi Range
Nicola
So full of twilight dreams that glitter
Herbert
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
“Doo Da Doo Dah Doo Da Doo Doo
Nadine, Sarah, Nicola and Kimberley shouting a la Black Jacks
Kids! Don’t do drugs!
Sarah
Sugababes are gay!
Cheryl
X Factor! X Factor! X Factor!
(fade out)
I personally am shocked and excited about this new direction the Girls are going in. Do we think this will work? Will the new single appeal to the general public as much as the Grange Hill original WITHOUT the help of Zammo? And do you think Nicola will get away with the explicit use of the word “gnarly”…
(I…) Will,Ponder!…
